Tour Diary: Episode 1 (The prequel)

Tyin up some loose ends before we hit the road. We're gonna have a whole bunch of fancy new merchandise for sale soon. Shot glasses, trucker hats maybe, coozies, all kinda shit.
Basically, we gotta load up with all sorts of stuff, so's to take advantage of capitalism and stuff like that.

Our first gig in Kansas should be real doozy. We're driving straight from from the Hole in the Wall to the Granada Theatre in Emporia, with sound check at 3:45. Also, it's a United Way benefit, and there's no cursin allowed, nor drug references. At least not clear drug references. Luckily it's gonna be fancy as fuck, with free food and hotel rooms and no brown M&Ms. Not a bad way to get started.